The Fake Index Report is about the funniest sports-related fake accounts (that I follow) on Twitter. The Index will be posted each week* with the the top ten** fake posters since the last index. Please join this insane and pretty-much worthless enterprise by following my Twitter list of Fakes (or the fake accounts themselves). Any nominations for the Fake Index should be made via Twitter or in the comments of this post.
(* Or once every two weeks. Or whenever I feel like it.
** Or the top 15, or the top 8; I'm not going to hamstring Fake accounts into an arbitrary inflexible ranking list.)
One of the first questions I asked myself about Fake Index was, "What constitutes a true Fake account?" The primary element is a Fake account should be funny; mean-spiritedness that is not heavy-handed or agenda-based is allowed. Emulation or parody of an athlete, coach, sports journalist or otherwise real person is not required. (Requiring parody would be hypocritical -- I may be The Fake Gimel Martinez but I have never once pretended to be Real Gimel or once acted like a student-athlete.)
Do the Fake account who parody sports celebrities have an unfair advantage against the Fake accounts who don't parody? Possibly. Parodying Fake accounts have more structure from their target celebrity, can emphasize already-mockable elements of the celebrity (like @DaggumRoy's accent) and can have joke material handed to them within the turn of their target's news cycle. (Deadspin's Brett Favre exposé uncovered a load of jokes for Brett accounts.)
That's not to say that the non-parodying Fakes (like myself) can't compete on the Index. I will try to identify each account's style and judge accordingly. Non-parodying accounts will be judged for overall humor writing and execution. There's a million ways to win Twitter: choose one.
Today's Fake Index
1. @NotJerryTipton -- I will have to write a better profile of NJT later. The TL;DR version: he parodies Jerry Tipton, a writer for the Lexington (KY) Herald-Leader. University of Kentucky basketball fans continually accuse the real Jerry Tipton of trying to destroy the basketball program -- accusations that are occasionally based in fact. One of NJT's primary gigs is twisting other reporter's tweets/quotes into negative assessments of the Wildcats and UK Head Coach John Calipari. He has gotten so popular with the Wildcats' younger fanbase that was asked to contribute a special "notes" column to KentuckySportsRadio.com. Some of the older Wildcats fans believe that NJT is the REAL Jerry Tipton, which says more about older Wildcats fans than I'd care to admit.
(Sorry if you didn't make the cut this week, other Fakes: didn't have time to get past the top-5.)